Hogan's Heroes (TV Series)

The Big Picture (1969)

Werner Klemperer: Col. Klink

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain Bohrmann : [entering Klink's office]  Colonel Klink. Heil Hitler.

  Col. Klink : Heil Hitler. Uh, please, Captain. Sit down, sit down.

  [closes the door to his office] 

  Col. Klink : Uh, what can I do for you?

  Captain Bohrmann : I have been assigned to Gestapo headquarters in Dusseldorf, but I'm living in Hammelberg at the moment. Hauserhof Hotel, room 209.

  Col. Klink : Very interesting. But is it important?

  Captain Bohrmann : Very.

  Newkirk : [listening in from the coffee pot]  What's this Captain's game?

  LeBeau : Keep quiet, and maybe we'll find out.

  Col. Klink : Of course I remember the plot to assassinate the Fuhrer. Could any loyal German ever forget it?

  Captain Bohrmann : I don't think you will. The conspirators are still being rounded up. A very important man was recently arrested. I searched his house.

  [takes out a picture from his coat pocket] 

  Captain Bohrmann : Found this picture and the negatives.

  Col. Klink : Mm-hmm.

  [looks at the picture and sees himself next to the conspirator] 

  Col. Klink : No, it's not possible!

  Col. Hogan : Klink sounds like he swallowed his monocle.

  Kinchloe : Must be some picture.

  LeBeau : Klink and a woman, maybe?

  Col. Hogan : Impossible. Klink's in love with Klink. Wouldn't let anyone come between himself.

  Col. Klink : General Mulendorf.

  Captain Bohrmann : That's his arm around your shoulders.

  Col. Klink : Yes. We were friends.

  Captain Bohrmann : Close friends.

  [voice turns stern] 

  Captain Bohrmann : And very possibly associated in the plot to assassinate the Fuhrer.

  Col. Klink : [drops the picture]  I knew the man. We went to school together for ten years; saw each other every day. But what's that?

  Captain Bohrmann : You were also best man at his wedding.

  Col. Klink : Oh, well... I had nothing else to do that afternoon.

  Captain Bohrmann : Colonel, I have a problem. If turn this picture into Gestapo headquarters, an innocent man may be executed.

  Col. Klink : Innocent?

  Captain Bohrmann : You.

  Col. Klink : Me? I'm not innocent. I mean, I am innocent. What have I done?

  Captain Bohrmann : If I destroy the negative, or... give it to you, I won't exactly be doing my duty, will I?

  Col. Klink : No. You do have a problem.

  Col. Hogan : Klink's beautiful, isn't he?

  Kinchloe : Little Alice in Krautland.

  Newkirk : How stupid man one man be?

  Col. Hogan : Keep listening. He'll tell you.

  Col. Klink : And you expect me to pay your hotel bill?

  Captain Bohrmann : In addition to say, a thousand marks right now. While I consider the problem.

  Col. Klink : Couldn't you consider the problem a little less expensively?

  Captain Bohrmann : The life an innocent kommandant is at stake.

  Col. Klink : Oh. I'll get the money out of the safe.

• Col. Klink : You mean you will work for nothing?

  Col. Hogan : We want to beautify this place. We want it to look nice when General Patton's tanks come rolling in.

• Col. Klink : Schultz, is money all that concerns you? Don't you ever think of the experience you're getting in the service?

  Sgt. Schultz : Kommandant, couldn't I get experience on full pay?

  Col. Klink : Doesn't it mean anything to you to serve the Führer?

  Sgt. Schultz : Is the Führer on half pay?

  Col. Klink : Don't you have any love for your fatherland?

  Sgt. Schultz : Oh, I do, Herr Kommandant, I do. But couldn't I have love and money?